Mary Boone Communications

PEORIA, ILL. -- It could have been worse.
I could have been the big loser on "Family Feud." Or I could have run down the wrong aisle on Lifetime's "Supermarket Sweepstakes."
Instead, I spun "Bankrupt" on "Wheel of Fortune," the highest-rated syndicated show in America. Indeed, I was one of the lucky few.
Spinning a wheel and buying vowels on national television isn't something I've long aspired to. But it's exactly what I did earlier this month when I flew to CBS Studios in Burbank for a taping of "Wheel of Fortune."
I'd tried out for the chance to spin the "Wheel" in June, when show executives traveled to Peoria to audition more than 400 central Illinoisians.
Only 43 of those who auditioned here were selected to be on the show. We were told we might appear on the show anytime in the next 18 months. That why I was surprised when, on Oct. 29, just four months after my audition, I got "the call."
It was Gary, one of "Wheel's" contestant coordinators. He wanted to know if I could make it to Los Angeles for a Nov. 9 taping, and he needed my answer immediately.
"Well, OK," I said, my voice filled with an odd mix of anxiety, excitement and terror. That gave me just 9 days to make travel arrangements, practice the game, and worry.
Getting an airline ticket on such short notice wasn't difficult, just expensive. (Mark down $410 in the expense column.)
Since I'm not an avid "Wheel" watcher, I felt the urgent need to do some heavy cramming. Actually, my husband -- with dollar signs in his eyes -- was the one who felt the need for me to do some cramming.
He began referring to the game as "Wheel of Airfare" and bought both the home-version (an $11.95 investment) and the computer game ($5.80). He put me on a strict training schedule and seemed pleased each time I beat him in practice.
By the time I got to Burbank, I'd accumulated millions of dollars in pretend winnings and could buy vowels with the best of them.
I arrived at CBS at 10 a.m. Nov. 9, where I met the show coordinators and 14 other contestants. The group included a caterer, an engineer, a secretary, and some actresses, among others.
Since we were going to tape a week's worth of shows, we each brought with us two changes of clothes. If we won, we could be on as many as three shows.
We spent the first hour at the studios signing waivers that said we knew no one employed by Merv Griffin Enterprises or any of the major networks. We reviewed rules, got a series of pep talks, and went over the list of prizes that would be offered.
Sufficiently psyched-up, we were then herded into makeup. A pair of makeup artists covered our imperfections with heavy foundation and highlighted our features with dramatic eyeliner, blush and lipstick.
After makeup, we were escorted to lunch at the CBS commissary, and then to the studio for sound checks and practice spins.
The "Wheel" studio is fairly good sized, with props that look considerably tackier in person than they do on TV. Plywood, glitter and Christmas tree lights account for most of the decorations. The wheel itself is simply painted plywood, and it's a lot heavier than I'd ever imagined.
We all took turns calling out letters on a couple practice puzzles. (Never say "May I please have an 'M'?," we were told. Just say "M." It doesn't waste as much time.)
With hours of practice and talking about the game under our belts, at 1:30 p.m. we were finally ready to start playing.
In a less-than-scientific manner, we all drew ping pong balls out of a garbage can to determine who would play each game. My lucky number game up for game No. 2.
We didn't see host Pat Sajak and letter-turner Vanna White until the cameras started to roll. They looked the same in person as they do on TV -- both short and tan -- and had limited but cordial interaction with contestants and studio audience members.
Pitted against a photojournalist and a part-time emergency vehicle dispatcher, both from Hawaii, I felt confident as a introduced myself to Pat, Vanna, the studio audience, and the millions of invisible television viewers.
My confidence was at a high. My luck, unfortunately, was not.
The game went by quickly, and most of it is a blur. What stands out, though, is that almost as quickly as I accumulated money, I'd spin and land on "Bankrupt" or "Lose a Turn."
I won't go into the gory details here. (You can see the show yourself at 6:30 p.m. Dec. 17 on WHOI-TV, Channel 19). Suffice to say that I came home with some lovely parting gifts. (Total estimated value, $620. That puts me $192.23 in the black for those keeping track.)
Sure, I would have liked to have won a $3,200 annuity, or a $4,500 crystal vase, but I
didn't.
Instead, I came home with a supply of fine hair care products, pleasant memories, and some very important television knowledge: It is far better to have lost on America's favorite game show, than to have won on a lesser one.